This is why I hate online dating. Hotty McHottnes was hot like 10 years ago. WTF! Why can't people put recent pictures of themselves? Is it that f'n hard? I mean Lorri, Jason and I went through a simple round robin process of picking pictures of ourselves. It only took us 2 bottles of wine and 3 hours.
Stoney was nice. We had great conversation and he was pretty funny. He had a swim before we met so he came to District in sweats. Oh hell no!
The date lasted about 1.5 hours and I texted Lorri an S.O.S. I told Stoney I had to meet my friend, I didn't tell him I was meeting her there. I pretended to leave and then went back into the bar to have another drink and appies with Lo-Lo.
Ears sent me an email today, and said he wanted to hangout again. Seriously? I haven't responded yet. I thought I was nipped!
I have Date #3 tomorrow at 3 in Cole Valley with a guy whose pretty cute. He's half Swedish and half Filipino. I'm probably related to him somehow, all filipinos are, I'm not kidding.
So you know what that means Jason? Dinner is on you darling!!!!
Ugh 2 more months of this crap!!
Saturday, November 29, 2008
Friday, November 28, 2008
this just in.
This is dating correspondant, Suki, checking in.
It's 7:06PM and I have not gotten a call from Lissa to:
A) come rescue her from a God-awful date from Baloney
B) Come commiserate with her on a horribly bad date with baloney.
If I'm interpreting this correctly, Lissa has been on this date approximately 1.5 hrs and is still going strong. No one voted off the island yet.
Stay tuned for the full report.
It's 7:06PM and I have not gotten a call from Lissa to:
A) come rescue her from a God-awful date from Baloney
B) Come commiserate with her on a horribly bad date with baloney.
If I'm interpreting this correctly, Lissa has been on this date approximately 1.5 hrs and is still going strong. No one voted off the island yet.
Stay tuned for the full report.
Back from LA
I took a little "work vacation" to LA last week, so the Match.com ladies have been missing my amazingly witty emails for a week. Well, given my incredible 0 for 7 response rate on emails thus far, maybe missing is the wrong word. But now that I am refreshed and inspired by L&L's dates I expect that my next emails will be far more persuasive (that, and perhaps I'll remove the fact that I play poker for a living from my profile or target less compelling girls).
Anyway, with online dating failing me thus far, I have been resorting to the old fashion party and bar channels. Results thus far:
1) No bar numbers, but I would like an official ruling on whether talking to one girl for an hour at a bar in LA counts as a date?!?! I mean, that was clearly a longer interaction than Lissa's first date (boo-yah!) and resulted in more or less the same place.
2) 3 numbers from parties...
-- Catch up with old friend at party, get number, go on date. Date is great; second date to follow.
-- After talking to a girl for an hour at a party (again, could already be a date, right!?), I think about asking for her number. Similarly to my LA experience, I decide I don't want to. But then I realize that I also don't want to buy dinner and ask for her number anyway. The next day I conclude that it would be really dick of me to go on a date with someone just to win a bet. Funny, but dick. So I don't call.
-- Thanksgiving number burning hole in my pocket. Ok, maybe not burning a whole, but warm.
So, with 3 days left in the month, and only 1 date completed, I am either going to have to get hyper aggressive with my 2 numbers (always a winning strategy) or accept the fact that Lorri is a stud and hope Lissa will have to split the bill with me. Let me make some calls...
- J
Anyway, with online dating failing me thus far, I have been resorting to the old fashion party and bar channels. Results thus far:
1) No bar numbers, but I would like an official ruling on whether talking to one girl for an hour at a bar in LA counts as a date?!?! I mean, that was clearly a longer interaction than Lissa's first date (boo-yah!) and resulted in more or less the same place.
2) 3 numbers from parties...
-- Catch up with old friend at party, get number, go on date. Date is great; second date to follow.
-- After talking to a girl for an hour at a party (again, could already be a date, right!?), I think about asking for her number. Similarly to my LA experience, I decide I don't want to. But then I realize that I also don't want to buy dinner and ask for her number anyway. The next day I conclude that it would be really dick of me to go on a date with someone just to win a bet. Funny, but dick. So I don't call.
-- Thanksgiving number burning hole in my pocket. Ok, maybe not burning a whole, but warm.
So, with 3 days left in the month, and only 1 date completed, I am either going to have to get hyper aggressive with my 2 numbers (always a winning strategy) or accept the fact that Lorri is a stud and hope Lissa will have to split the bill with me. Let me make some calls...
- J
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Prelude to Date #2
Wow, this turkey is strong. I have a date tomorrow with hotty mchottness (at least he is in his well thought out online montage). Like true alcoholics, we decided to meet in the afternoon for a cocktail. I arranged this mostly so I can bail and hopefully meet up with Lorri and Jason, if things go awry like they did with Ears.
He was curious about my 'occasional smoking', but said he was a smoker too, just not cigarettes. I shall call him 'stoney baloney'. I'm sure he'll be paranoid and have the munchies. At least this will be more entertaining.
He was curious about my 'occasional smoking', but said he was a smoker too, just not cigarettes. I shall call him 'stoney baloney'. I'm sure he'll be paranoid and have the munchies. At least this will be more entertaining.
Date #1 - You've just been nipped
I'm about to take a tryptophan induced nap, after my 3rd Thanksgiving meal of the day. It's not even dinner time yet. It's been football, food, repeat all day long. Before I nap and eat again, I thought I'd write about my first (wish it was my third) date with 'southern and cultured' (aka 'Ears') on Tuesday.
Captain's log:
5:30 - Gather my belongings at work to go home an unwind before my date.
5:31 - Hi-jacked by Mihir, my lead developer, to talk about an issue with my product.
6:30 - Stressed and cursing, I finally leave work to wait for the bus.
6:45 - On a packed and smelly bus, getting a pep talk from Jason as he looses $4000 while playing poker.
7:15 - Stressed, cursing and pacing, I get a 2nd pep talk from Lorri telling me to just have fun and enjoy myself.
8:00 - Still cursing, I make it to the pub and get a 3rd pep talk from Dean, Elaine, Cynthia, Patrick and Erich.
8:03 - Dean offered to lick my face and say "I'll be seeing you later baby" during my date.
8:05 - Witless and semi-boring banter with Ears. He parroted practically everything I said. I finally went into 'I'm just going to talk to entertain myself' mode.
8:10 - Drive-by checkup by the newly shorn Cynthia.
8:20 - Drinking.
8:25 - Drinking.
8:30 - Drinking.
8:35 - Drive-by from Dean; thankfully no licking.
8:40 - Drive-by from Nora, thank God!
8:45 - Ears tells me how he met this chick online and took her out 3 times, but felt he had to 'nip it in the bud' because sparks weren't flying.
8:50 - Ears nips it in the bud with me and says 'Happy Thanksgiving'.
8:55 - Mocked by Cynthia, Erich, Patrick, Nora, Dean and Randy; and Jason via text.
9:15 - Watched and enjoyed a repeat of 'Law and Order' and finished off dumplings, while waiting for the next 'Law and Order' (it suddenly dawns on me why I'm single).
Captain's log:
5:30 - Gather my belongings at work to go home an unwind before my date.
5:31 - Hi-jacked by Mihir, my lead developer, to talk about an issue with my product.
6:30 - Stressed and cursing, I finally leave work to wait for the bus.
6:45 - On a packed and smelly bus, getting a pep talk from Jason as he looses $4000 while playing poker.
7:15 - Stressed, cursing and pacing, I get a 2nd pep talk from Lorri telling me to just have fun and enjoy myself.
8:00 - Still cursing, I make it to the pub and get a 3rd pep talk from Dean, Elaine, Cynthia, Patrick and Erich.
8:03 - Dean offered to lick my face and say "I'll be seeing you later baby" during my date.
8:05 - Witless and semi-boring banter with Ears. He parroted practically everything I said. I finally went into 'I'm just going to talk to entertain myself' mode.
8:10 - Drive-by checkup by the newly shorn Cynthia.
8:20 - Drinking.
8:25 - Drinking.
8:30 - Drinking.
8:35 - Drive-by from Dean; thankfully no licking.
8:40 - Drive-by from Nora, thank God!
8:45 - Ears tells me how he met this chick online and took her out 3 times, but felt he had to 'nip it in the bud' because sparks weren't flying.
8:50 - Ears nips it in the bud with me and says 'Happy Thanksgiving'.
8:55 - Mocked by Cynthia, Erich, Patrick, Nora, Dean and Randy; and Jason via text.
9:15 - Watched and enjoyed a repeat of 'Law and Order' and finished off dumplings, while waiting for the next 'Law and Order' (it suddenly dawns on me why I'm single).
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
immunity
I just want to confirm I met Unique Date #3 for lunch today. That gives me immunity for the month of nov. weeeeeeeeeeeeee.
On another note, I think i may officially retire from this experiment after this month. Waaay too much effort and planning involved.
On another note, I think i may officially retire from this experiment after this month. Waaay too much effort and planning involved.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
ambigudate
So I grew up on east coast, and I have to say dating was pretty straightforward. Boy meets girl, boy asks girl for number, boy calls girl, boy asks girl out on date. date ensues. (girls do ask guys out- but it's much less common)
What happens after that varies, but for the most part, this is standard script. My favorite thing which is not a given, but seems way more common on the east coast, is the post-date text message or phone call. This is a quick message to say "I had a great time tonight- thanks." I can't illustrate how much I love the post-date message. It's thoughtful and sweet.
Since moving to California, I feel like every formality has been melted down into "the hang out". Someone calls someone, they eventually meet up for a drink, some food, or a walk, and then you part ways to meet up with friends and you may or may not see them or hear from them again. And you never really know if there was ever interest outside of friendship.
So I ran into an old friend from home, randomly, a couple weeks ago and we agreed we meet up for drinks to catch up on the last 12 years. I never assumed this was a date. Upon reflection of the night and discussions with various male and female friends, we've hypothesized it was indeed- a date. Let me present the facts:
1) He arranged the whole thing: where to meet, where to eat/drink (ok, I'm a little old-fashioned, but i think it shows confidence when a date arranges stuff-and it shows that he put some degree of thought into it)
2) I met his brother and his gf, and saw his apt (briefly- before date- get your mind out of the gutter!)
3) Drinks turned into dinner...
4) He paid for everything- in stealth mode. I never even saw the check. (I would never have let him pay if I had gotten my hands on the bill)
4) He drove me home. Again I know this is a little old-school of me, but I love it when a guy picks me up and/or drives me home. I don't mind meeting people somewhere, but it just feels better when you arrive and leave together (note:this doesn't apply to people you meet online)
5) There was definitely an affectionate vibe, if I hadn't gone in for the hug at the end of the night, there may have been a move made
Whether there is a second meetup, it's too soon to tell, but I did have a great time. It was (for obvious reasons) much more natural than date #1 with the gov'na and we laughed a lot reminiscing.
So even if it doesn't go any farther, it makes me hopeful that chivalry is not dead.
Lissa confirmed last week that any unique date counts- even if it's initiated the old-fashioned way, so I think I have fulfilled 2 of my 3 unique date requirements to make me immune to dinner buying.. woo.
What happens after that varies, but for the most part, this is standard script. My favorite thing which is not a given, but seems way more common on the east coast, is the post-date text message or phone call. This is a quick message to say "I had a great time tonight- thanks." I can't illustrate how much I love the post-date message. It's thoughtful and sweet.
Since moving to California, I feel like every formality has been melted down into "the hang out". Someone calls someone, they eventually meet up for a drink, some food, or a walk, and then you part ways to meet up with friends and you may or may not see them or hear from them again. And you never really know if there was ever interest outside of friendship.
So I ran into an old friend from home, randomly, a couple weeks ago and we agreed we meet up for drinks to catch up on the last 12 years. I never assumed this was a date. Upon reflection of the night and discussions with various male and female friends, we've hypothesized it was indeed- a date. Let me present the facts:
1) He arranged the whole thing: where to meet, where to eat/drink (ok, I'm a little old-fashioned, but i think it shows confidence when a date arranges stuff-and it shows that he put some degree of thought into it)
2) I met his brother and his gf, and saw his apt (briefly- before date- get your mind out of the gutter!)
3) Drinks turned into dinner...
4) He paid for everything- in stealth mode. I never even saw the check. (I would never have let him pay if I had gotten my hands on the bill)
4) He drove me home. Again I know this is a little old-school of me, but I love it when a guy picks me up and/or drives me home. I don't mind meeting people somewhere, but it just feels better when you arrive and leave together (note:this doesn't apply to people you meet online)
5) There was definitely an affectionate vibe, if I hadn't gone in for the hug at the end of the night, there may have been a move made
Whether there is a second meetup, it's too soon to tell, but I did have a great time. It was (for obvious reasons) much more natural than date #1 with the gov'na and we laughed a lot reminiscing.
So even if it doesn't go any farther, it makes me hopeful that chivalry is not dead.
Lissa confirmed last week that any unique date counts- even if it's initiated the old-fashioned way, so I think I have fulfilled 2 of my 3 unique date requirements to make me immune to dinner buying.. woo.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Turkey Day
I'm having my first date next Tuesday with "Southern and cultured" at the Dubliner. Hear that Dubs? All hands on deck! The big day is November 25th, mark your calendars. I figure this is a good way to kick off my Thanksgiving break. Family holiday parties can somewhat be depressing for me. You would think that they'd be full of joy and merriment with all the children running around the house. But I'm the only ONE in my family that hasn't produced offspring and my aunts, uncles and cousins remind me all the time. "You better hurry up Lissa." "You need to settle down, you're getting old "Are you a lesbian?" I can't help but feel like I'm being Darwined out of my own people, especially after seeing my younger pregnant cousin. This is actually her third child, so she's lapping me at this point. Don't worry, I'm not pulling a "Species" with any of my dates. I just hate holidays and first dates. Can I just buy you guys dinner already?
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Date #1
So I just came back from meetup #1 with a guy that I will nickname "gov'na" for the sake of some degree of privacy.
I almost wish things went horribly bad and/or awkward but to tell you the truth it went smashingly well, due to the following factors:
A) he was cute, and actually resembled his photos quite well
B) he had excellent teeth
C) he was quite engaging. Not once did we have to resort to "yahoo icebreaker" questions like "what is you're favorite color?" or "What was your most embarrassing moment?"
It was smooth and fun. I found myself wanting to invite him places. If anything I'd say the only negatives, were A) I think he's a tad shy of the 5'10" he quoted (hard to tell as I was wearing heels) and B) he's not as beefy as I would like.
After calling Lissa earlier to say I'm bored with this and unhopeful, I'd say this date renewed my faith in the process.
It's on.
I almost wish things went horribly bad and/or awkward but to tell you the truth it went smashingly well, due to the following factors:
A) he was cute, and actually resembled his photos quite well
B) he had excellent teeth
C) he was quite engaging. Not once did we have to resort to "yahoo icebreaker" questions like "what is you're favorite color?" or "What was your most embarrassing moment?"
It was smooth and fun. I found myself wanting to invite him places. If anything I'd say the only negatives, were A) I think he's a tad shy of the 5'10" he quoted (hard to tell as I was wearing heels) and B) he's not as beefy as I would like.
After calling Lissa earlier to say I'm bored with this and unhopeful, I'd say this date renewed my faith in the process.
It's on.
Can I post now?
So, yes, I did just spend an hour trying to write emails. More Jason insights:
1) Turns out I infer a lot by where you are from. Example: What does it really mean if you live as a single 28 year old in Walnut Creek (other than that you have a long Netflix queue)?
2) Writing into emails is HARD (yes, even with my roommate's help). You like pepperoni!?!?! I like pepperoni too!!!
3) If I write 2 emails a day for the next 30 days, I can match the number of emails Lorri and Lissa received within the first 24 hours of having their profiles public. Perhaps this was a poor bet on my part?
Emails sent so far: 3. Responses: 0. Shocking? No.
- Jason
1) Turns out I infer a lot by where you are from. Example: What does it really mean if you live as a single 28 year old in Walnut Creek (other than that you have a long Netflix queue)?
2) Writing into emails is HARD (yes, even with my roommate's help). You like pepperoni!?!?! I like pepperoni too!!!
3) If I write 2 emails a day for the next 30 days, I can match the number of emails Lorri and Lissa received within the first 24 hours of having their profiles public. Perhaps this was a poor bet on my part?
Emails sent so far: 3. Responses: 0. Shocking? No.
- Jason
our father who art in heaven...
Hello, world.
This is Adam, Jason's roommate, making a desperate plea to Lorri and Lissa to end this early. Not for Heidi's sake, but for mine. Now that he's finally got the profile down (and thank you to all of his friends who told Jason that "be smart...that helps" was not funny but just dickish), he's moved on to asking me to help him write emails to girls he likes on Match.com. For the last hour he sat on the couch whining about how hard it is to write these things and asking me to come up with funny quips or subject lines. L&L--I know you guys have Jason's best interests at heart in humoring him on this betting thing, and I like you both and think you deserve to meet great guys, but I can't handle 2.75 more months of being Jason's creative muse. Even my dedication to getting Jason some ass only goes so far. Save me!
adam
This is Adam, Jason's roommate, making a desperate plea to Lorri and Lissa to end this early. Not for Heidi's sake, but for mine. Now that he's finally got the profile down (and thank you to all of his friends who told Jason that "be smart...that helps" was not funny but just dickish), he's moved on to asking me to help him write emails to girls he likes on Match.com. For the last hour he sat on the couch whining about how hard it is to write these things and asking me to come up with funny quips or subject lines. L&L--I know you guys have Jason's best interests at heart in humoring him on this betting thing, and I like you both and think you deserve to meet great guys, but I can't handle 2.75 more months of being Jason's creative muse. Even my dedication to getting Jason some ass only goes so far. Save me!
adam
Quantum of Solace
The polls may say I'm ahead in the amazing date race, but I believe Lorri is having coffee with a potential suitor as I blog. While I've rigged the widget (Jason-this is why I wanted administrative access), I'm ahead because my people at Noe Valley's Dubliner have voted for me. You guys are the best! I know most of the bartenders, the waitresses, and about 75% of the patrons at this place where everyone knows my name, and has my back. I figured this will be the perfect comfortable setting for my dates. It'll help me be more at ease because it's like being at home, and let's face it, first dates are as much fun as the stomach flu. I'll also have the peace of mind that at least 20 secret service are surrounding me to make sure homeboy doesn't slip a ruffie in my drink and take me home to put the lotion in the basket. Now I just need the dates and it's slim pickins' out there my friends! To make things worse, Lorri and Jason made me do the unthinkable last Friday night at 10p. They made me login to Yahoo personals to show them the dark horses in the running. So now all these people know that I logged in on Friday night to troll for men. Why isn't there a stealth mode login? ARRRGH!!
Thursday, November 13, 2008
needing some motivation
So the new sense of anticipation of what I'll find in my inbox is interesting. Kind of like christmas morning, except it's like Christmas morning with MY family, where you got (and still get) toothbrushes and packs of sugar free gum in your stocking. ya...aay?
Been talking to a few people- may be on my way to the 3 dates that make me immune to buying Lissa and Jason dinner this month. Take that bitches! BUT I'm kind of losing interest already. Yeah it's fun on paper, but in person I'm dreading a meetup. Holy awkwardness and disappointment batman. What's a suki to do?
Been talking to a few people- may be on my way to the 3 dates that make me immune to buying Lissa and Jason dinner this month. Take that bitches! BUT I'm kind of losing interest already. Yeah it's fun on paper, but in person I'm dreading a meetup. Holy awkwardness and disappointment batman. What's a suki to do?
Since I have been mocking everyone else on Match.com...
...I suppose someone should get to mock me.
Here you go:
http://www.match.com/matchus/profile/showprofile.aspx?ortp=1&TP=U&uid=g+EUG6OEiYFjTR6Zxo5xfw==&lid=21
Mockery, praise, and feedback welcome.
Here you go:
http://www.match.com/matchus/profile/showprofile.aspx?ortp=1&TP=U&uid=g+EUG6OEiYFjTR6Zxo5xfw==&lid=21
Mockery, praise, and feedback welcome.
Glamour Shot
Jason do you have any pictures like this? I really think this is what your profile is lacking.
BTW, I think we need a widget for profile of the week. I have some winners!
Online dating savant
I apologize for my low bloggership. I've been super stressed out at work (ask Rucha). I think I look double-jointed in my limbo contest picture, because I'm getting a lot of responses. I promise to focus and participate more once I get my PRD signed off. Plus, these are tough times and I don't want to be taking you fools out to dinner!
Things I learned thus far:
1. Lyrics from rap songs make great intro lines. I still like "LA face with an Oakland booty" but I felt "Don't call it a comeback" resonated more with me.
2. Delete all messages from profiles without pictures, they're probably ugly.
3. Don't pick someone whose intro line is "Pick me, pick me".
4. Icebreakers = winks = I have nothing to say but "I want to get in your pants".
All that being said, I'm scared! So I'm making Jason and/or Lorri chaperon undercover on any scheduled dates. Either that or you guys better be on-call!!
Ok back to my PRD :(
Things I learned thus far:
1. Lyrics from rap songs make great intro lines. I still like "LA face with an Oakland booty" but I felt "Don't call it a comeback" resonated more with me.
2. Delete all messages from profiles without pictures, they're probably ugly.
3. Don't pick someone whose intro line is "Pick me, pick me".
4. Icebreakers = winks = I have nothing to say but "I want to get in your pants".
All that being said, I'm scared! So I'm making Jason and/or Lorri chaperon undercover on any scheduled dates. Either that or you guys better be on-call!!
Ok back to my PRD :(
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
The Date Search Begins!
While I am way too tired to write emails to the potential future Mrs. Heidema this evening, I did decide to prove my commitment to my future wife by spending an hour searching my "mutual matches".
And so I present to you my top ten observations from my first hunting experience...
10) Match.com has an impressively annoying user experience. If poker doesn't work out at least I know Product Managers should be in high demand.
9) There are a ton of people on this site; it could take a while to filter through them. Then again, at the rate I am burning through search results, that could be a good thing.
8) I am going to go ahead and assume that these are the best pictures folks can find of themselves, and discount my expectations accordingly. I will grant you, this doesn't say much for me either.
7) As a corollary to #8, 90% of my matches get the auto-boot on pictures alone. Don't hate the player, hate the game.
6) San Francisco is a big city, right? Then why does everyone live in Sacramento!?
5) If you write anything remotely similar to "I love grabbing life by the horns", you have skipped directly to strike three.
4) There are bunch of people who are either lying about their age or have lived in a wind tunnel their whole lives.
3) If your tag line is a terrible quote from a bad philosopher...
2) If your profile is more than 5 paragraphs, you are BORING.
1) All mentions of being old fashioned, looking for a kindhearted man with a strong moral compass, or frequent church attendance mean I should probably not respond, right?
Bonus Observation) Women really like to say they want a guy that is 5' 10" and above. Fine, and I want a women who is actually "curvy"...
I say, this list should lower my lead in the opinion poll, ey?
- Jason
And so I present to you my top ten observations from my first hunting experience...
10) Match.com has an impressively annoying user experience. If poker doesn't work out at least I know Product Managers should be in high demand.
9) There are a ton of people on this site; it could take a while to filter through them. Then again, at the rate I am burning through search results, that could be a good thing.
8) I am going to go ahead and assume that these are the best pictures folks can find of themselves, and discount my expectations accordingly. I will grant you, this doesn't say much for me either.
7) As a corollary to #8, 90% of my matches get the auto-boot on pictures alone. Don't hate the player, hate the game.
6) San Francisco is a big city, right? Then why does everyone live in Sacramento!?
5) If you write anything remotely similar to "I love grabbing life by the horns", you have skipped directly to strike three.
4) There are bunch of people who are either lying about their age or have lived in a wind tunnel their whole lives.
3) If your tag line is a terrible quote from a bad philosopher...
2) If your profile is more than 5 paragraphs, you are BORING.
1) All mentions of being old fashioned, looking for a kindhearted man with a strong moral compass, or frequent church attendance mean I should probably not respond, right?
Bonus Observation) Women really like to say they want a guy that is 5' 10" and above. Fine, and I want a women who is actually "curvy"...
I say, this list should lower my lead in the opinion poll, ey?
- Jason
Monday, November 10, 2008
a rocky start
Apparently match.com thinks I'm a total loser. My daily 5 matches included a 41yr old who quotes moby dick and a guy who's opening line is this "I am a chinese. I don't speak English very well. I have been married two years. And now we are separation. we will divorce"
Gaaaah.
Gaaaah.
Sunday, November 9, 2008
The setup: My POV
So when I agreed to go over to Lissa's I thought it was to help out with drunken profile creation- not participate, but I got sucked in to the insanity. What the hell.
The concept of online dating is appealing in theory- like shopping for men. You pick out which ones you like, try them out and just return them if they make your ass look fat. But in reality- it feels more like a scavenger hunt, where you have to do a lot of digging to uncover all the bullshit.
It also feels pretty uncomfortable to plaster yourself all over web with a big sign that says "I'm looking!" I have a sinking feeling I may end up as a "persona" in one of Yahoo's new product marketing meetings.
But despite initial reservations, I think it will be an interesting experiment. And being a highly competitive person, I look forward to racking up some free dinners. Hey we are in a recession, right?
The concept of online dating is appealing in theory- like shopping for men. You pick out which ones you like, try them out and just return them if they make your ass look fat. But in reality- it feels more like a scavenger hunt, where you have to do a lot of digging to uncover all the bullshit.
It also feels pretty uncomfortable to plaster yourself all over web with a big sign that says "I'm looking!" I have a sinking feeling I may end up as a "persona" in one of Yahoo's new product marketing meetings.
But despite initial reservations, I think it will be an interesting experiment. And being a highly competitive person, I look forward to racking up some free dinners. Hey we are in a recession, right?
The Set-Up
So, Lissa, Lorri, and I got together at Lissa's place tonight, drank some (a lot of) wine, and all set up our online dating profiles.
Things I have learned:
1) Both Lissa and Lorri think they look drunk in every picture ever taken of them.
2) I am drunk in every picture ever taken of me.
3) Lissa does not want to date anyone remotely like me.
4) Writing about yourself is haaaaaaaard.
I will post again in a bit once all our profiles are approved so you can see them. Apparently, this takes up to 72 hours, so none of us will be getting any new ass until at least Tuesday.
If any readers would like to become a contributor to this blog, you simply need to agree to get an online profile up, go on 3 unique online dates a month, and buy us all dinner if you fail. So easy!
Get pumped people.
Things I have learned:
1) Both Lissa and Lorri think they look drunk in every picture ever taken of them.
2) I am drunk in every picture ever taken of me.
3) Lissa does not want to date anyone remotely like me.
4) Writing about yourself is haaaaaaaard.
I will post again in a bit once all our profiles are approved so you can see them. Apparently, this takes up to 72 hours, so none of us will be getting any new ass until at least Tuesday.
If any readers would like to become a contributor to this blog, you simply need to agree to get an online profile up, go on 3 unique online dates a month, and buy us all dinner if you fail. So easy!
Get pumped people.
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